Monday, April 23, 2012

Life Through New Eyes!

It has been so long since I have posted anything new on here. There is so much going on and changing in my life that I simply didn't have the time. Most of the changes have been good and for the better. I made a move to TX and then journeyed my way back to the Sunshine state. I learned so much about not only life in general but about myself. Everything happens for a reason and I know that trip was a complete life changing experience. Nothing actually major and significant really happened. It was just a total change in my way of thinking. It's like I'm seeing life through a whole new pair of eyes and I love it.

Now that I have a new way of thinking I'm starting to take on new commitments, make life goals and reach farther than I ever thought I could. My newest venture is writing a novel. Now, I know many people will laugh at this concept but I really don't mind what people think or say at this point. This is something that I want to do for me. It will take much time and I most likely won't have anything published but I've set the goal to just finish it. Whether it's a piece of crap or a masterpiece it will be mine. Ahhh, so excited!

I pray that everyone goes through this moment in their life and experiences this amount of vast clarity. It's simply amazing to say the least.

Thursday, February 2, 2012


Love means something different to so many people. My mother will tell you that love in the sense of "fairy-tale" romance does not exist. To her love is tolerating someone enough to marry them and eventually trust them enough to allow them to share their lives together. (obviously her views are slightly jaded.)

To my grandparents (my pillars in life) love is their life. My grandmother told me that she had never seen what a Godly man was or was supposed to be like until she met my grandfather. My grandfather was her first and only boyfriend. They have been married for 50 years. They have had their ups and downs, arguments, financial trouble, family deaths and turmoil in their own relationship. But not once did they even consider divorce. When I asked my grandmother why she said, 'because God brought us together and it's not an option to part.' As simple as that. After being married 50 years they still look at each other like they are newly weds, still tell each other they love each other daily and I still catch them holding hands or sneaking a kiss. Their love is what I have based my idea of love on (with my own twist of course).

I believe that when I find that person I'm supposed to marry, I'm holding on for life. There is no option for divorce. I love the idea of life with someone who knows me inside and out and loves me despite my inadequacies. I believe in that fairy-tale love, the crazy over the top grand gestures and gentlemanly southern manners. I believe that there is someone out there that someday God will allow me to meet and he will complete me. The love I think of is that fantastical Disney princess romance. *shrugs* It may seem childish to some but as many times as I've been hurt in past relationships and spent Valentine's Day single I will forever be a hopeless romantic.

Thursday, January 19, 2012


Well, in the months that I've been traveling from state to state, town to town, (essentially being a gypsy) I not only had a good time I learned alot. I know now where I want to be and what I want out of life. I have worked on issues that have prevented me from maintaining a normal relationship, or any relationship for that matter. Everything happens for a reason no matter how big or small. So much I have learned and experienced on this journey. And I think that finally, finally I have gained a new perspective in life. I now know what matters and what doesn't matter. I am so grateful for the awesome people in my life and even more, I'm oddly grateful for my past. Because if it were not for my past I would have never become the person I am today. Bottom line: I'm a new person with new hope and perspective for a new year. I can't say that I'll never hit a rough patch again or that I won't have issues down the line but I do know that I finally have the 'tools' to work through it all. I pray that everyone else can experience the same thing at one point or another.