It's not nice to talk gibberish.

I find myself at the office alone....yet again. Where is everyone else you ask? Well, they each have their own excuses as to why they aren't here. "I was out until 3am at that strip club down the street," or "I didn't get to sleep until 6am." Either way...I get some quiet time to myself so I don't mind too much. Plus it's Friday which makes everything better.

Last week I went on vacation to TX. Not usually the top vacation spot but because one of my best friends lives there it made it epic. We went floating down the Guadalupe River. Always fun when the river guide tells you to 'keep left at the first turn and then right at the second or else it's a bumpy ride.' Really? I have no paddles, there's hardly a current and you want me to steer in specific directions? Negative. What ended up happening was S and I yelling and screaming when we couldn't get over to the right side in time which resulted in our butts getting smashed on the rocks below...super. And to top it off S thought it was a great idea to pick the 4 hour tour instead of the 2 hour tour.

After we floated the river we went to the bustling, culture drenched San Antonio. We checked into the historic St. Anthony Hotel. Beautiful hotel, vintage circa 1901 yet it has been somewhat updated over the years. Looking at the lobby and the long hallways it made me start to feel as though I was caught between The Shinning and The Twilight Zone. I was told that the 9th floor is haunted and that as long as we don't get that floor we should be fine. I blew it off and thought that they probably just tell people that so they can attract those who have an addiction to the weird and unknown. I was apparently wrong. I have always been curious about what happens after death and whether or not the 'spiritual beyond' truly exists. I will now tell you a story that you may or may not believe. All I know is that I know what I heard and felt.

S and I met up with some friends at a local piano bar near our hotel. It was a great time, none of us had more than one or two beers and after watching some drunken patrons make fools of themselves we decided to call it a night around 11:30pm. As S and I walked back to the hotel we argued about who would use the bathroom first. And because she was much faster than me she won the argument. When it was my turn I went into the bathroom and sat on the loo. As I sat there I was replaying the scenes of the night and thinking about what a great time I had...then I heard a voice. Now, let me verify that S was on the other end of the suite in the living room area and the t.v. was not on in either the bedroom or the living room and that no one else was in the suite except the two of us. As I was trying to determine whether or not I heard anything in the first place I heard the voice again only it was louder and clearer than before. It was a man's voice that whispered, "Help me." I have never exited a bathroom so quickly in my entire life. I didn't even bother pulling up my pants. When I told S she said I was just making things up. So I went out into the hallway to get some ice and try to convince myself that I hadn't heard anything and I must just be very tired. On my way back I felt a hand brush through my hair. I proceeded to go back into the room, pray hard and slept with the t.v. and the lamp on. That is my story....do with it what you will.

I should be in bed.

When it's raining so hard that you can't see the road ahead of you...that's a sign that maybe we shouldn't be driving into work. Rainy days always translate to lazy days especially in Florida. If you have never experienced the wonderful rainy season of Florida...let me enlighten you. First the sky turns black...and I'm not talking just a little dark I'm talking 8:00pm dark. Then the rain comes. Now this is no ordinary rain. This is a torrential downpour. This wonderful combination makes it almost impossible to drive in and in turn makes you not even want to leave your house. It has been like this all day....which is not cool in the least bit. It's one thing if I had something to do at work but alas I do not. The server is down which means no one can do any work yet the boss thinks we all need to be here. Super. Is this day over yet?

Just Breathe...

You know when people say that their patience is wearing thin or they are losing their patience? Well today mine does not exist. Why? Maybe it's because it's Monday and I'm back at the office. Maybe it's because my father has gone on more dates this weekend than I have in an entire month. Or maybe it's just because I don't want to be here at the moment and my supervisor has decided to take what I said and throw it back and me like she's trying to teach me how to do what I just schooled her on. And all of that is just a mere fraction of it all. Now granted I'm not in a 3rd world country fighting for my life and food and living in poverty...I am grateful for what I have; I truly am. All I'm saying is that I'm just a little annoyed and I need to find some perspective in these motions that we call life. What's the trick to it all? Are there cliff notes or shortcuts somewhere? I only wish that I knew.

Hot Mess

I was told by my boss yesterday that I need to get it together and find pride in my work again. Don't get me wrong, I really do like what I'm doing but I just don't think I like it as much as I used to. After 5 years working at the same firm...I'm kinda burned out. I'm making 'rookie mistakes' according to my boss. 101 mistakes that are so minor it's ridiculous. I think I just need a different career all together. Maybe I'll just move to Ireland for a year and work at a market or something. It's just sad that I don't have the passion that I used to. Thank God that today is Friday which means that I don't have to be a professional until Monday. I hope that everyone else is having a much better day! :)

Sunday UN-funday

It's only 2:42 in the afternoon and yet it looks and feels like it's 5:30p. It's rainy, dreary and boring. I keep trying to think of something different to do to kind of wake me up from my funk that I've let become my life for the past few months. I've thought of joining the Peace Corp, AmeriCorp, moving to a different job, etc. Maybe I can get a telecommuting job and just travel all the time, or maybe I can just save up and move to a remote island for a year.

Since my surgery in April I just kinda shut down. Why? I have no clue...if I knew I would most definitely change it! My BFF suggested that I get a job in a different state or get a job in two states and travel between the two during off seasons. I think the real problem is that I don't really know what the problem is. I just feel as though I'm consumed with repetition....and I can't stand standing stagnant. **Sigh**

Online dating is a drag.

Everyone always says how fantastic online dating is and how this friend or that friend found their soul mate and how they're getting married. I beg to differ. Not only do you get judged by your pictures alone but 9 times out of 10 you're going to be contacted by someone who's sole purpose for using the website is just to find someone to 'hook up' with. I'm sorry but I don't want to catch hepaslutalitis. And as a 25 year old professional I am especially tired of getting the little 21 year olds who think that if they tell me that I'm gorgeous and that I am an angel. Little do they know that as far into the game as I am I know all the tricks, pick up lines and my BS meter is very accurate. Maybe I should just put out an add in the paper: '25 year old female seeks mature, respectable, responsible male. Do not contact just meet me at this place at this time.' Or maybe I'll just join a nunnery. lol

'I gave her my heart and she gave me a pen.'

So today I decided to chalk it up and tell the boy that I wanted to come visit him. His response? Well, the gf and I are kinda on a break right now. (I'm thinking sweet action this is my prime chance to tell him that I really like him) thus I continue to tell him that I was thinking about taking a road trip with a friend up that way and thought that I would come see him since it's not too far away from where he is. He thinks this is a great idea! (now I think I'm really about to drive this thing home) He then proceeds to tell me that he's just not in a place in his life right now where he should be in any relationship and kinda just needs to take a break and work on him. Super. I thought that only girls used those lines. I basically put a bow on my heart and hand delivered it to him only to have him throw it on the ground and stomp on it. And so my boring single life continues....